Messy Bedroom
I’m not going to get into the nitty gritties about parenting in this blog. Of course we want to teach our young people how to be organised, clean and tidy. And as a parent, you can pick your own battles. But when I looked at my 9 year old son’s room, I didn’t rant and rave about how messy it was, because in his mind it wasn’t overly messy. In his mind he knew exactly where everything was located and didn’t mind stepping over things, like a Lego minefield and a pile of Transformers. He could see that the rubbish bin was full, but that didn’t stop him from adding more tissues to it. And he didn’t feel the need to put away his school uniforms after they were washed, due to the simple fact that he would be wearing them again the next day.
We do have a rule in our house which is that you must make your bed each morning, but perhaps my son thought it didn’t apply to weekends? He’s at an age to look for loopholes in the parenting system, which is why it is important to clarify grey areas and be consistent.
When I stood in the doorway with him by my side, and calmly pointed out the multiple tasks that needed rectification, he just shrugged his shoulders and looked at me with puppy-dog eyes. Had I pushed the issue, I can almost guarantee that the tears would have started flowing and then I’d have another mess to deal with. I didn’t want that on Sunday morning. Instead I simply pointed out that it wouldn’t take too long for me to sort it out and I let him enjoy his downtime (Year 4 is exhausting if you didn’t already know!).
The messy room consisted of the following:
Empty Lego boxes
Soft plastic from the Lego boxes
Full rubbish bin
Bed not made
Undies on floor
Clean clothes on floor
Transformers in a pile on floor
Multiple Lego sets on floor
Blanket on floor
Messy desk
Cubbies need a general tidy
So I got busy. I started with the easy and obvious tasks. I removed the empty Lego boxes. (My kid is one who does not need to keep the boxes. If your kid likes the pretty pictures, cut out the main picture and put it in an accordion folder (or similar), along with the instructions and save for a later date). Then I removed all the soft plastic bags. I removed the rubbish bin. I put the blanket that had been laying on the floor for a month into the washing machine. Undies went down the laundry shoot. I put the Transformers back into their allocate storage tub. To my surprise, I found a used, disposable face mask and a pair of socks amongst them. So random!
That was 10 minutes and the room looked better already. Then I folded and put away the clean clothes. That was another 10 minutes. I made his bed, but then decided I should wash the sheets so I added them into the laundry with the blanket. That gave me a sense of efficiency.
All that was left from the list above, was a general tidy of his cubbies and the messy desk. Oh, and the multiple Lego sets. This is where i strongly urge you to stop. Leave the Lego alone. I know my kid likes to play with it and has it set up in a particular way - please don’t change it. Let them keep their creativity and imagination flowing. Kids like to play with loose parts, let them.
I truly felt like I had done the job I wanted to do, and it took a grand total of 30 minutes!
Time to reward myself with a cuppa.
Next weekend I’ll sort out the cubbies and desk, but I’ll ask him to participate. Why? Because he can take ownership of where he wants the items on the desk to be located. And he can take control of how the cubbies will work best for him. And I’ll have the upper hand, meaning he can’t say no, as I tidied up the rest of the room without him the previous week.
You might think that’s a bit of a guilt trip, and, well, I’m okay with that.
